My hero theme song: (Every hero needs a triumphant theme song! Add yours using the audio widget. Here's how.)

I am known as:

SMILF (Step-Mom I'd Like to...)

My superpower:

Can breathe limitlessly under 1 foot of water, as long as wearing snorkel. Can balance half-empty bottles of Sprite while playing Spiderman in the bathtub and feeding a yapping weinerdog.

My weapon of choice:

Kick-ass flippers and threats of time-out.

My Kryptonite:

"I love you, Mama."

Mode of Transportation:

Self-propelled by Tab energy drink.

You should also know that:

This is a recently developed power and is still under construction!